Has your spouse ever served you in secret and then you found about it later? I always ask this trick question: When you serve your spouse do you serve to show them that you love them? That is what most of us do and it is the wrong motive. If you serve expecting a reward and then your spouse does not notice and you don’t get a pat on the back, you usually end up getting your feelings hurt.

I believe that you should serve in secret and look to Jesus for your reward and not your spouse. When we serve in this way, we are not looking for any reward from our spouse as we are just doing what we are commanded to do.

Mark 10:45 ” For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give His life as a ransom for many.”

John 13:12-17 ¹² When he had finished washing their feet, he put on his clothes and returned to his place. “Do you understand what I have done for you?” he asked them. ¹³ “You call me ‘Teacher’ and ‘Lord,’ and rightly so, for that is what I am. ¹⁴ Now that I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also should wash one another’s feet. ¹⁵ I have set you an example that you should do as I have done for you. ¹⁶ Very truly I tell you, no servant is greater than his master, nor is a messenger greater than the one who sent him. ¹⁷ Now that you know these things, you will be blessed if you do them.

The key to serving is to understand that we are commanded to serve so that when we do serve our spouse it should not be to show THEM we love them but instead we serve in obedience to a command from God to show HIM we love them. Then HE rewards us beyond measure.

Try it: Spend a week as a secret servant.